Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Are You Pregnant?


Here's what I hate (there are two things):
1) When people ask if I'm pregnant (this has happened already).
2) When people ask when we plan on having kids (happens even more often).

Here are my responses:
1) I feel like this is a polite way of asking why I've gained weight.  How rude!  If I were pregnant, believe me, you'd know.  You'd know because I really, really can't wait to have kids and I'd probably tell anyone who stops to listen when I am.  If you're important to me and I haven't told you, then it's probably a pretty good indication that I'm not.  So quit asking me.
2) Intrusive much?  This is absolutely none of your business.  You are not my husband, and you are not the Lord, so trust me, I won't be counseling with you about it.  Please do not try to tell me when we should have children (I don't care if your opinion is to have them right away or wait 10 years to have them)...I don't want to hear it.


For us, it has been very difficult in trying to understand when the Lord would want us to have children.  It has been difficult because we feel we are ready and that we could handle it (or at least make it), but we feel that the Lord is telling us to wait just a little bit.  It's even harder, though, when people who have no idea what's going on are giving unsolicited advice concerning whether we should "begin our family immediately" or "take our time, finish our degrees, establish our careers, have some vacations, and enjoy each other for awhile".  


Let me do some reassuring for all who are concerned.


Here is a statement issued by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (this is the church we belong to and we fully support and adhere to its doctrine).  My emphasis is added: 

"Children are one of the greatest blessings in life, and their birth into loving and nurturing families is central to God’s purposes for humanity. When husband and wife are physically able, they have the privilege and responsibility to bring children into the world and to nurture them. The decision of how many children to have and WHEN TO HAVE THEM is a PRIVATE MATTER for the husband and wife."   

Yes, we want kids.  Yes, I personally wish I was one of the nineteen women I know right now who are pregnant.  Yes, it is hard for me.  No, we are not putting pregnancy off for selfish reasons.  Yes, we've got it figured out for right now what we are supposed to be doing.  No, we do not need outside opinions.

So quit being rude and leave me alone about it.
 

2 comments:

  1. Yeesh...
    -Your Husband

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  2. You go girl! Kim told me about your post, and it is awesome. I love the quote you included from the church. Some people just don't get it, so I'm glad you are telling them what's what.

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